Wednesday, 23 November 2011

End of the Road?

Either I have lost my blogging mojo or I am ready to end this chapter.

I haven't written in a while, my inbox is teeming with PR emails, some of which you may call impressive opportunities.  Offers of Christmas Hampers, makeovers in London, a Spa day, a tv commercial and not even the offer to be sent a ton of chocolate is making me muster the energy to reply.  I haven't written about Belle's first day at nursery or any other exciting things which have been going on.

I am happy, we've been poorly, but life is good.  A new business in the pipeline.  Our offer on the new house got accepted.  All the family are healthy and Belle is, well she is just adorable and amazes us, making us laugh too much by the things she comes out with.  So perhaps I am just ready to move on from this blog?

Something else has been playing on my mind too.

I received a lovely email the other day from a reader. It was heart-warming and she went on to say how she loves my blog but it was these words that made me think "I wish to have your life when I'm older". It has really made me think...

Am I portraying a life which is just not realistic?

I do seem inclined to tell you all the good news, post all my favourite pictures. I have tried to talk about the hard times in parenting, the teething and sleepless nights but the truth is I wouldn't change it for the world, so I don't grumble too much.  Perhaps it is subconscious and it, if I am honest, does reflect my personality too. I don't tell the world my problems, I am not one to shout from the rooftops if I am having a stinking day.

So here I am. Worrying I am not fulfilling what I set out to do with this blog.  I wanted to help parents with commonplace parenting problems.  I wanted to show how rewarding being a mother can be, how utterly out of this world it is to bring a little life into the world, for the daddy too!  How it really is the most awe-inspiring thing you will ever do in this life, but it is not easy!  I wanted to show how your life can still remain your life though and I wanted to document all Belle's special first's.  There are far too many stereotypes surrounding mum's, so I wanted to balance my mummy life with my personal life, however intertwined they may be.  In doing this I have attracted an audience of non parents, a growing number of teenage girls and now I am questioning how much I am helping.

Am I actually feeding the very thing I hate?  Those images of women in the media which lead to young girls feeling insecure, always trying to live up to an exaggerated or fabricated image?  Or perhaps, on the other hand, with all the media images of women could mine be less damaging and actually encourage more girls to aspire to be good parents one day. Or am I simply worrying too much?  I don't think so, we all have a responsibility in society to do and be the best we can.

Should I be more candid with my writing, don't only post about the pleasing and exciting stuff?  I have written about upsetting things before but because my blog is not anonymous it unfortunately caused more problems then it cured.  Perhaps less pictures and images?  But then that is the creative side which makes me, me. Finally Belle is her own little person now, she is forming her own opinions, she doesn't just look like every other 'baby' either. Because of this I am starting to feel it is not my right to put her life out here. It doesn't sit quite right with me anymore.

So there we have it, have I just made my mind up about this?

10 comments:

  1. please don't stop blogging - I love reading your posts. Maybe you could adapt your blog to other things, not all about Belle. As you say, she is getting older now, attending nursery and more in mainstream education where days become more structured and not so much about her achievements or milestones.
    Could you do more about what you like or are doing? I am not sure if you work or not - you could focus on that part of your life - or turn your blog into a review blog with no family life included at all.

    I think you need to think about what you want to do and go from there. I hope you are back blogging about something soon x

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  2. Wowsers. I don't know what the answer is but maybe it's to start again - without the pressure of 'an audience' and figure it out as you go along. Hope you come to the right decision for you. x

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  3. I for one love your blog. Its one of my favourites. I've been inspired to start my own blog from reading yours amongst others. I have decided to try and keep it anonymous but thats just me cringing if anyone I knew read it. Hope you keep blogging, youre very good at it xx

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  4. I love your blog but if YOU don't feel comfortable then that's what matters. Maybe a fresh start (Belle starting nursery, new house, new chapter) is what is needed. But it's ok to take a break too.

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  5. I haven't visited in a while but I've always loved your posts, and I think the world of blogs would be a lesser one without your lovely dreamy take on it. But I do know where your coming from. My other half often says he wishes he knew the girl on my blog because she has such a fabulously positive life ! Thing is , it is me, just me on a good day, because like you , that's the days I want to write about. I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing. Be who you are Hun, if you inspire young girls to be good, possitive mothers in the future then that's no bad thing. There are plenty of bad examples around and if you inspire people with your pretty Rose coloured world I think that's fab! Xxx

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  6. It's an interesting dilemma and for me, I think it comes down to what YOU want and why YOU blog.

    If writing the happy memories and moments, and creative photos makes you happy, and your readers enjoy it then that's all that matters. You could switch your blog to meet the needs of some readers, but alienate others in the process - I don't think you can be all things to all people.

    But if part of your blogging is about having broader goals and wanting to provide a more realistic view of the parenting experience then by all means, change, start again, whatever you like - it's your blog.

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  7. Firstly I have to say that I love your blog. As you know I first heard about your blog before I even really knew what blogging was, and it definitely inspired me when it came to writing my own.
    I think fundamentally what is important is that it is truly your blog and therefore your rules - you should only do it if you are enjoying it. You come across in real life as a very positive, bubbly person and that is exactly how your blog is too. That's not to say that I think your life is perfect - nobody's is - but it says a lot about you that it is generally the positive things you choose to share. I sometimes think that to my readers I must appear the complete opposite because it is my tendency to blog about the hard times as that is how I cope with them - but I am not just a miserable cow, I promise!
    Ultimately it is your decision to make whether it be that you want to take a break or give up all together but whatever you do please don't feel forced into anything.
    And if you do continue to blog I will be right here reading it xx

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  8. It sounds like you definitely need a break from blogging. Don't do anything hasty. If you get the urge to write a post in the future, that's great. If not, I'll miss you. Take care x

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  9. You know what, I don't shout about all the bad thing either. There are some things you simply keep to yourself. And why not show the good side to being a parent? Like you said, its YOU. We all write and express ourselves differently. I personally enjoy your blog and always love coming around and seeing some bit of good news. Besides, its just gorgeous to look at! And I think you accurately portray motherhood.
    lots of love from across the pond!

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  10. Thanks so much, to you all. I am going to keep the blog up and just blog whenever I feel like it, if I feel like it. Perhaps once our house move is done I will want to pick it up again more routinely, perhaps not. But thanks for all your support on the 'worrying' side xxx

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